And Also, I Am Not Pregnant

The hubs and I just watched the History Channel's special on the 40th anniversary of man landing on the moon. It started out with a half-hour of historical footage from the lunar landing. Shamefully, I had never seen this before in its entirety. As we watched the replay of the "live" CBS coverage from that day 40 years ago, two things came to mind: HOLY SHIT WALTER CRONKITE WAS FUCKING OLD EVEN IN 1969 and NEIL ARMSTRONG, BUZZ ALDRIN AND MICHAEL COLLINS ARE BADASS MOFOs. With equal passion behind each thought.

Seriously, those three men sat on a bajillion gallons of rocket fuel that had pretty much a 50/50 shot of blowing them up on the launch pad. Wile E. Coyote had the same odds against the Roadrunner. Look it up, that shit's been proven. Okay, to recap, so the plan was thus: Assuming they successfully made it into the earth's orbit, they would use the remaining tons of jet fuel to force them in a path toward the moon, some 250,000 miles away. Then, assuming they successfully made it into the moon's orbit, Armstrong and Aldrin would hop into the lunar pod thingy, detach from Collins and the main spacecraft and land on the moon. Sounds easy, don't it.

All this was reenacted in "Moonshot," the History Channel's second part of the anniversary coverage. It was brief - only an hour and a half long and separated by commercials -- but it was a good retelling of the events. (Things that I didn't know about Apollo 11 and her crew: Aldrin has a PhD in astrophysics and really is "a rocket scientist," as the three astronauts were orbiting the moon, they saw an UFO, and a felt tip pen saved Aldrin and Armstrong from certain death on the moon.)

But as much as I enjoyed all the education crap, my most favorite part of all this 40th anniversary coverage remains the video of Buzz Aldrin punching a moon-landing-denier in the face. Five years ago. When Buzz was 72-years-old. At the time, the conspiracy theory nut was in his 30s. That right bitch, you got knocked the fuck out by a septuagenarian. Bahahahahahahahahahahahah.