So yeah it's been a while. This feels like that first phone call after a first date -- awkward but necessary if we're going to move forward. Thank you for answering on the first ring.
It's been so long since I posted that I have received hate mail. Hate mail that didn't involve criticism of my being fat, profane or a bad animal owner. I think that might be a first for me. I'll have to disappear more often. The Random Assholes of the Internet are way less pointed in their shitty emails when they think you might be dead. My favorite reads: "Hope you aren't dead yet."
Well, rest assured I'm not dead. Yet. I've been on something of a hiatus. No posting. No Ragmonster making. No extraneous work of any kind. In fact, I've just returned from a vacation to New York and the wedding of my baby sister. And some where in there I turned 30!
So that's what I've been up to. Marrying off my beautiful baby sister, taking a work-free respite and hitting the big 3-0.
While we were away, my mama kept our dogs for us. And well I'm really fighting sleep right so I'll just give you the quick version: Deuce was a dickhole. He peed in her bed. For spite. He peed on mama's little tiny dog. He peed on the floor in such a way that created a boobie trap and threw her to the ground.
Guess who's never being invited back to his grandparents?
Ever since we got home Deuce has been on a bit of a douchy kick. Growling. Hiking. Pooping places one should never poop. We think he's punishing us for leaving him. The nerve! And he has been in such a mood that his "Naught Ear" has been at def con 1. Constantly. Like it's stuck that way.
And, yall, it takes all my will power now to just THUMP the shit out of that ear. THWAP! Take that Naught Ear!
Let the bad pet owner emails commence.
-- Post From My iPhone
4 comments:
moma pugs parents did not say duece could not come back to their house. granny only said momma pug had to stay in attendence while he was there. that way it would insure the duece will not be involved in any kind of fatal accident.
popeye
moma pugs parents did not say duece could not come back to their house. granny only said momma pug had to stay in attendence while he was there. that way it would insure the duece will not be involved in any kind of fatal accident.
popeye
man that popeye is a pc guru aint he? sent the same message twice.
hahahaha
the ears of small dogs are very sensative. you shoudlnt hit them. the blood vessels can burst if you do and cause internal bleeding. it could go to his brain and cause a stroke. then how would you feel if you kilt another animal?
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